Lonely Evening

I’m sitting here, waiting for the husband to get back from his trip to Richmond, VA. You don’t realize how lonely it is without your significant other until they’re gone. I left for work before he did this morning. It’s going to be really rough Friday when he leaves for ten whole days! I’m going to be so lonely… he’s the only person I really talk to. Sigh. Not having friends kind of sucks.

Evangeline is asleep. She went down fairly easy, but there’s no guaranteeing that she’ll stay that way. She’s been waking up around ten or eleven, depending on when she went down. She’s been asleep since eight and it’s now just past nine… I’m expecting her to wake up. Maybe I’m even hoping? Wow, that’s how you know I’m lonely!

I haven’t even eaten dinner. I’m just really not hungry and honestly, I have no idea how to “cook for one”. I’ve lost all of my lone wolf habits! I’ll have to get some quick and easy meals for when the husband is away… that or I’ll lose some weight while he’s gone, haha.

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We took some family photos this past weekend at the in-laws. I’m still really upset that I didn’t get my professional photos, but I got some good ones of the baby and some passable ones of us all together. I’m usually the one ruining the shots. You can see the camera remote in my hands in a few of them, sigh! It’s either that or my necklace or hair are a mess… or I’m making a stupid face. I hate being in pictures. I am not naturally photogenic at all.

Evangeline is becoming more and more mobile each day, she’s growing so fast. Getting the pictures were really important to encapsulate this time forever. Soon, she won’t be my baby anymore. That kind of breaks my heart. I never thought I’d enjoy the baby period, but I really have. Now she’s becoming her own person and not just my little snuggle bug. It’s amazing to watch but it’s also kind of sad.

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She’s been incredibly clingy as of late and won’t accept daddy when it comes to being comforted. She constantly wants me or boob. I’m honestly not sure how I’m going to parent without breastfeeding! It’s like the catch-all solution. I think I’ll miss breastfeeding, too. I remember being so uncertain about it, even when I was in the midst of labor. It was tough at first and I’ve had my issues (especially with pumping), but I’m glad I did it. I’d do it again. It is/was worth it.

Eva has also started making ridiculous faces. I think she’s finally figured out that she can control her facial expressions. Her favorite one right now is this hilarious “Chucky” face! It really does look like him and she does like this breathing laugh… it’s so devious but also very hilarious!

She’s moved up to the one-year-old class. It’s been a slightly rough transition, mostly due to the fact that they can only take one really long nap… and well, that’s never been Eva’s strong suit. She sucks at napping and I can’t even remember when she’s ever napped longer than forty-five minutes! So, she’s quite tired and cranky. She’s adjusting, though… slowly. She’s definitely more engaged and active with all of the new toys and activities, though.

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It’s hard to get anything done with her now, as she’s started scooting around. If you turn your back for five seconds, she’s somehow made it across the room! I doubt she’ll crawl. The most she’s managed on her belly is pushing herself awkwardly backwards… but she wants to walk. I’m a little concerned she might do it while the husband is away! I’m definitely buying a “baby fence” (read: play yard) so I can at least get some things done.

I keep randomly thinking back to last year at this time… how different things were. It’s kind of amazing. I had no idea how much my life would change… or even how much I would change. Geeze. Seems like worlds apart now.

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I really thought I’d enjoy being alone. I thought I’d get some “me” time, but I’m mostly just bored and anxious. I was printing out pictures of Eva (as I’ve made zero progress on her album since her birth), but then my printer decided to be stupid so now I have to wait for the husband to fix it. I’m awful with printers… I always end up breaking them. He still won’t let me live down ripping off the bottom tray…

I’ll have to come back in and add the pictures I took later. I’m too lazy to run downstairs!