This post may border on TMI for some. If so, you’ve been warned, you don’t have to read. For the brave, well, feel free to continue forward.
I originally went on birth control to regulate my hellish periods. Serious. They were like being touched by the hand of Satan in the girly bits. I would bleed profusely, puke, and pass out. Thankfully, it was isolated to the first day. I rarely got the angries, but I was frequently depressive to the point of it being… ridiculous. Anyway, I went to a doctor after a few years and they said that perhaps I just had too much estrogen. I’ve been on birth control for about a year now. It’s working pretty well. It isn’t perfect, but the pain is definitely gone and I bleed normally now. My anemia, it cries out in glee.
I am waiting on my period now, however, and it is not coming. It is Wednesday, I stopped the pills Sunday, as I was supposed to. I’m on twenty-eight day cycles. Where oh where are you, fair period? I am feeling like shit. I have the symptoms, but yet it is MIA. I had a slight bit of spotting, but hardly anything to raise alarms about. My insides are churning so loud my fiancé has been giving me odd looks. I am crampy and unusually cranky. This is probably because my damn period IS BEING A LITTLE BITCH. Get your ass over here, young lady, and get this party started. Come ON. Don’t you dare think you can wait until I go to work. I still get sick when it starts and sometimes, I start sweating and it triggers other things and bam. I am out like a light. Blegh.
It could be the stress, also, that I am having lately. I tried to work on my writing, but I can’t. My emotions are everywhere and I go from feeling hopelessly depressed one minute to hopelessly enraged the next. I go from wanting to give up to wanting to tell everyone to piss off and give up. My domain registration requires renewal in a few weeks. It would be so easy to just disappear and save myself the heartache and the headache… but I would and could never do that.
Especially not in this shitty mindset. Rational thought? Not here, at least… not right now. Maybe later. Leave a message, I’m sure it’ll get back to you at its earliest convenience! I’m still waiting for it to call me back…
Back to playing Harvest Moon: Tree of Tranquility while I can. The fiancé and I have been fighting over it for days. Neither of us have any free time and when we finally do, it’s together and we both want the same thing. Hilarious and horrible.
Oh, and I work a 11-9 shift this Saturday. YEAH, that’ll be great. Kill me now, please. Watch me come in Sunday, too. I can’t bitch, though, because I have serious bills that need to be paid. Why must I have my head up my ass when it really ought to be thinking?
Probably because I am too busy contemplating the best way to kill people in a certain community for being such asshats. I hate popularity, I really do. And in another vein, I’ll never understand why people FLOCK to kiss the feet of someone who only posts once a year and never comments on anything except when she’s “in the mood” to play the game itself or create.
Maybe I should do that. Then, maybe, I can be cool, loved, and OHSOPOPULAR!! too.
Fuck that–aren’t even fit to kiss my ass.
And while I’m offending everyone and their mother… people who drool over their own characters and call them sexy and whatnot? FREAK ME THE HELL OUT. Quit lusting over pixelated, non-existent man cock. It’s fucking weird.
I totally shouldn’t hit post, but I will. Fuck it. I censor myself way too much, why do I care if someone on the internet hates me? OHNOESTHEPOPULARSWILLEETME!